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Speaking from the heart

A  few years ago, when still at work in a turnaround endeavor, I was sent to a school. This school was a “bootcamp for the brain.” The name of the company that does this training is Rapport Leadership International. The course was “Leadership Breakthrough 1” and I came back a different person, a better workmate, and it helped me become less bitter and angry about how screwed up my company had become.

It’s a good thing too, because I was eventually fired. My boss, (the VP of Sales) was fired and he was the one who hired me. I was looked upon as part of a failed regime and knew my time to be limited. Thanks to him I was recommended for the course (you must be sponsored to attend) and and the company paid the considerable fee. He saw how grouchy I had become and knew Rapport would help my attitude. That it did indeed.

The training takes place in the desert outside of Las Vegas. You arrive there on a bus with your classmates, who you haven’t met yet and don’t know from Adam. In a matter of 2 and 1/2 days you end up knowing some of them better than family members and most of them way better than your co-workers. I will not go into their practices and procedures because I don’t remember the details all that well. What I do retain is the key of the course.

What I learned was how to communicate sincerely, effectively and powerfully. It meant I had to honestly care about the people with whom I worked. It meant dealing with the whole person, but not letting that get in the way of doing our jobs. Just another way of approaching what should have been a common goal. No matter what you call it, if practiced it works.

It made a difference in  my marriage as well; for the better I believe. My wife was able to fold the improved version of me into our existence seamlessly, the way she accomplishes most things.

Now that I’m spending my days writing on the web I am working to bring what I learned to my blogs and all other written communications.

 I read from a very popular blogger on self improvement that he picks his subjects like they would be important to millions and then writes as though he’s talking to a person sitting across from him. I think  this combines speaking sincerely (or in this case writing) and picking material worthy of a large audience.

So for me, the subject of speaking from the heart is worthy of the attention of everyone. Not the kind of hurtful honesty so in vogue today, but the kind that comes from a place of humility, truth and courage. It’s tough to even think this way, much less to speak or write it. Yet speaking from the heart requires you first “think from the heart”. This in return means you must care about the people around you and from that you can learn to express yourself sincerely.

While in Rapport I listened to an Instructor tell about her childhood, her life, and her dreams and aspirations in such a powerful and sincerely passionate way that many cried. I admit to being among those who shed a tear for the words that so obviously came from the heart. Many of us do this in times of anger, hurt, or stress.

At these times we speak the unvarnished truth with a direct connection to our emotions without much filtering. The trick is to be able to express your powerful positive emotions, passion, and dreams in the same way. When you can do this even unwilling listeners  or readers will be moved to action or understanding.

It seems to me that on a blog you can only show your heart by respecting your readers and not being false in your voice. The catch is you must do this intentionally to be effective.

The older I get, the more I realize I actually know less; about anything.  So I make no pretense here of knowing how to do what I’m talking about any better than the next person, only that is an important skill or attribute to have for not only your on-line writing but your day to day communication with family, friends and co-workers.

Look to that place inside you for truth in your motives, actions and words. Take heed of the human needs of others when you interact with them and speak from the heart with power and passion when you can.